* A guy walks into a bar with an octopus under his arm. She leans over and whispers to him, 'I'll do anything you ask for $200, as long as you can ask me in no more than three words.' * Man walks into a bar, sits down next to a beautiful blonde. The man says, "OK, I'll have a beer for myself and a lawyer for my alligator." The bartender says: "Yes, of course we do!" * A man walks into a bar with his alligator and asks: "Do you serve lawyers here?". The bartender says, "I can't let you in without a Thai." * An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a Yank, an Egyptian, a MIJ, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Greek, a Russian, an Estonian, a German, an Italian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, an Israeli, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Czech, and a Swiss man walk into a bar. "NOW," he says, "wherez at ol' lady with the sore tooth?" Just when they think the man must be dead, he staggers back into the bar with his shirt ripped and gashes across his body. Everyone in the bar hears a huge scuffle outside - barking, yelping and growling, then silence. Tears are streaming down his cheeks, but he doesn't make a face. He grabs the bottle of pepper tequila with both hands and downs it, gulp by gulp. The new guy proceeds to drink several whiskeys, and eventually, he gets up his nerve. No wonder you've collected so much money - that's impossible!" "Well, I know I've paid my $10 bucks," says the man, "but I'm not an idiot. Third, there is a 90-year-old woman upstairs who's never had an orgasm in her life. You have to remove the tooth with your bare hands. Second, there's a pit bull chained up out back with a sore tooth. First, you have to drink that whole bottle of pepper tequila - the WHOLE thing at once - and you can't make a face while doing it. So the guy gives him the $10 bucks, and the bartender adds it to the jar. "Well, you pay $10, and if you pass three tests, then you get all the money." The man approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?" Synopsis of Children of the Night - ProstStageProduction.A new guy in town walks into a bar and notices a large jar filled to the brim with $10 bills. If you like these Walks Into A Bar jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.Īnd you can have a joke like these delivered on the hour, every hour now by following us on Twitter or liking us on Facebook. It was tense.Ī tennis player walks into a bar and starts serving. The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. The barman says “who ordered a spirit?”Ī roman centurion walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says “five beers please”.Ī roman centurion walks into a bar and points to a bottle. The barman says “I’m sorry, we don’t cater for functions.”Ī ghost walks into a bar. Barman says “you can have a beer but don’t start anything”.Ī SQL query walks into a bar, goes up to two tables, and says “can I join you?”į(x) walks into a a bar and asks for a sandwich. The barman says “sorry, we don’t serve Heineken here.”Ī man walks into a bar with a jump lead. The barman says “we don’t like your tie pin here”. The barman says “sorry mate, we don’t serve snakebite in here”.Ī man wearing a tie fastener walks into a bar. The barman says “we don’t serve food”.Ī bottle of venom walks into a bar. The barman shouts “Oi! Get out! We don’t want your type in here”.Ī termite walks into a bar and says, “Is the bar tender here?”Ī sandwich walks into a bar. Times New Roman and Arial walk into a bar. The train track says “a pint for me, please, and one for the road”. The barman says “Oi! You’re bard.”Ī train track and a motorway walk into a bar. The barman says “would you like a pint?” The horse says, “no, two halves”. A time traveller walks into a bar.Ī pantomime horse walks into a bar. The barman says “we don’t serve time travellers in here”. The barman shouted “Oi! I’ve told you! We don’t serve Noble gases in here! Get out!” The helium didn’t react. The barman shouted, “Eyh you, get out of here!” He gets a two-point deduction and ruins his chances of a medal. The barman says “you can’t come in here with those trainers”.Ī gymnast walks into a bar. Feel free to add them in the comments.Ī racehorse walks into a bar with its entourage. I have left out the most obvious ones, but there is still no guarantee of originality or funniness… No doubt, some of you will want to suggest some more. I’ve had a request this week for a topic for the puns and one liners, so thanks to Phil, this week’s page is A Man Walks Into A Bar jokes.
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In another case, the rapper Kodak Black was charged under a different subsection of the same 18 U.S. He also purchased guns for other people who couldn't lawfully obtain a gun. For instance, a man in Iowa who possessed a firearm while being an illegal user of a controlled substance received almost five years in federal prison in March, according to the U.S. “It should not have taken five years to come up with that resolution.”Īlthough it is difficult to pinpoint a case exactly that of Biden’s, there have been similar cases where defendants have received prison time. “My opinion is that if a prosecutor has already decided a defendant is going to get pretrial diversion on a gun charge, it is probably not worth the time and resources it takes to bring the case,” Meyer said. Joan Meyer, a partner at the law firm Thompson Hine, agreed, noting that while a charge related to a firearm typically is not the subject for pre-trial diversion, the fact that Biden had no criminal history and wasn’t using, or contemplating using, the gun for violence likely justified the diversion resolution. “This is probably a instance where being the president’s son − and having the eyes of the nation watching − precluded Hunter Biden from flying under the radar with a 'sweetheart deal.'" "I think the feds would not have been bothered with this kind of case if the subject wasn’t the president’s son,” Bader said. While the maximum sentence under the statute is 10 years in prison, prosecutors have wide discretion to defer prosecution or seek diversion programs and often do so in cases like Biden's where the offender has no criminal record, the charges are minor and the case does not involve aggravating circumstances like use of the firearm in a criminal act, according to Cheryl Bader, a former federal prosecutor who runs the Criminal Defense Clinic at Fordham Law. Legal experts USA TODAY interviewed agreed the pretrial diversion program was justified. Code § 922 (g)(3), which makes it unlawful for a user of, or someone addicted to, any controlled substance to possess a gun. On Biden's unlawful possession of a firearmīiden was charged with 18 U.S. Here's what legal experts say about the charges and whether it constitutes a sweetheart deal. But since he’s a Biden, he gets a slap on the wrist." Likewise, the House Judiciary GOP tweeted that "Hunter Biden should be looking at a minimum of five years in prison. "These charges against Hunter Biden and sweetheart plea deal have no impact on the Oversight Committee’s investigation," Comer wrote. House Committee on Oversight and Accountability Chairman James Comer, R-KY., who is leading an investigation into Biden's business dealings in Ukraine, alleged the charges "reveal a two-tiered system of justice" in a statement last month. Stay in the conversation on politics: Sign up for the OnPolitics newsletter He will appear in court Wednesday in Wilmington, Delaware.īut the existence of a plea deal has sparked outrage among conservatives, who say the charges are too lenient. He also agreed to enter a pretrial diversion program that could dismiss a felony charge regarding his unlawful possession of a Colt Cobra 38SPL revolver despite being a drug user. Last month, Biden agreed to plead guilty to two misdemeanor counts of failing to pay federal income tax after a five-year investigation. WASHINGTON - Republican lawmakers have slammed Hunter Biden’s plea agreement regarding tax evasion and firearm offense charges as a “sweetheart deal,” raising questions as to whether Biden was treated equally under the law compared to other defendants. Watch Video: IRS whistleblowers go public during House hearing on Hunter Biden case main libvlc error: interface "dbus,none" initialization failed main interface error: no suitable interface module dbus interface error: Failed to connect to the D-Bus session daemon: Unable to autolaunch a dbus-daemon without a $DISPLAY for X11 vlcpulse audio output error: PulseAudio server connection failure: Connection refused Here is the output when run on Buster: $ vlc -play-and-exit Daisy.mp4 Basically, it's unusable from the CLI.īuster is running version 3.0.11 of VLC and Bullseye is running 3.0.18. Switching to Bullseye results in either the video not working or being very slow to start and chopping off the first few seconds. Push the AB button again.I have been using VLC on Buster from the CLI with no problems. In your case, you want to loop through the entire video. AFAIK, it is about as seamless as you can get. This button is meant to continuously loop a partial section of video. Enable those buttons with View -> Advanced Controls. ^- Look at the little 'AB' button with the arrow over it. How will it keep both VLC windows synchronized? Will it have to push the play buttons on both? OK, now you have an ugly mouse pointer on the screen, and you can't be in fullscreen. But how will your script know exactly when the first window's video is done? And how will it switch the windows quickly enough? Something like xdotool to set the focus of the windows. You'll need a way to wuickly switch the windows. That seems like a black-hole way to do it. Then on an "end of video" event, I switch the layers. My thinking is I have 2 media player instances, one on top of another. I've been experimenting with libVLC but am struggling to get it to work. I mentioned I tried layering videos in my previous post, but I think my initial experiments with VLC may have been incorrect, so I'm returning to this idea as it seems like a viable option. Hence I'm hoping that by posting here I'll be able to find anyone who has had a similar problem and found a solution they're willing to share I could get around this by simple preloading the same file to play after the end of the first file, however every attempt I've tried of doing that has failed, perhaps because I've misunderstood something. Looking around online I have seen people asking about seamless looping in VLC, and it will supposedly be available in VLC 4.0.0 ( ). I believe VLC reloads the file and then has to rebuffer it, thus causing a slight delay. I have tried the VLC loop you mentioned, and while it does correctly loop, you can tell a noticeable delay/stutter of a couple frames at the beginning of every loop. I'm looking for a frame perfect loop, such that as the video ends it perfectly transitions back to the beginning with no delay. Just how high of a standard do you require? If anyone has any ideas, pointers, or examples they can share, I would immensely appreciate it. I'm at my wits end, and can't think of anything else. I have also seen some commercial video signage software that claim seamless looping, however I'm looking to integrate this into a larger project, so that would not be ideal for me. I do know that the hello_video demo on the Pi can seamlessly loop a H264 video, but I need a player that can handle containers such as mp4. beds=allow), but this is just OMX Player in disguise. I've also tried the Adafruit Video Looper (. I've scoured the web and documentation and keep coming up short. However I just can't seem to get anything to reliably work. I've tried programmatic approaches, such as having 2 instances layered on top of each other and switching at end of file. In all the above players I've looked through their documentation, tried different features (like playlists), but no dice. I've tried the latest VLC, again to no avail. I've tried MPV (built following this guide: viewtopic.php?f=38&t=199775), which was better but still had a noticeable delay. I've tried OMX Player, however the seek from the end of the video to the beginning has a noticeable delay. I've tried many different players with disappointing results. This is for a larger media player project I'm working on. the first frame plays after the last frame with no delay to video or audio. I have a Raspberry Pi 3B+, and I'm looking for video player that allows for true seamless looping, i.e. |
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